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Today Is The Trigger

Today Is The Trigger

Most people would look at this picture and laugh. The lady at the grocery store probably looked at me, saw parents with two small boys and a grocery cart full of food and just chalked it up to motherhood. It’s not that. I woke every hour last night and kept checking the clock. Luke came into the bedroom this morning and said “when are you getting up? It’s afternoon already!” I shot up in bed, petrified that it actually was....

Our Final Days – Four Years Later

Our Final Days – Four Years Later

This is the last picture we have as a family of four. I was forcefully reminded as I started my morning commute today that this is the week I hate. The recurring flashbacks of those final days for our family, of what we thought was a normal week. Crazy mornings trying to get Toby fed, Luke dressed, ready and out the door for work and school. Schedules coordinated for pick-up and drop off of two boys. School buses making each...

Keep Me In The Moment

Keep Me In The Moment

I am having a hard week. Each morning. Waking up. Getting ready for the day. It is my season of grief, which is heaviest because these are the days, when Toby was here with us, four years ago. [caption id="attachment_2398" align="aligncenter" width="768"] Toby & Mommy - August 2016[/caption] I continue to think about what it would be like to have him here, with all of us. Three little sets of feet running around. A need for three swimsuits, instead of...

Looking for the Light

Looking for the Light

I’ve looked at this picture 100xs since Wednesday morning. I was up early and crying before I even lifted my head off my pillow. I miss Toby. I want to hold my son. I want to say “You’re four!” And see him smile or laugh at me. I want to hear him laugh. I want to hug him and not let go. May 27, 2016 Wednesday I sat on the couch and waited for the sun. I thought it would...

Toby’s Fourth Birthday Celebration!

Toby’s Fourth Birthday Celebration!

On May 27th, Toby will turn four! In honor of our son, we are on a mission to raise $4,000 for The Little Fox - Toby's Foundation. [caption id="attachment_2346" align="aligncenter" width="576"] Tobias "Toby" Stern - born May 27, 2016[/caption] This campaign will run for four weeks and the proceeds will support the mission of The Little Fox, supporting families welcoming a new baby, educating on Safe Sleep Practices, and advocating for SIDS research. Over the past three years, the success...

Sunsets & Signs From You

Sunsets & Signs From You

We have seen some incredible sunsets over the last few weeks. Quarantine has my heart, among other things, missing Toby so incredibly deeply. I always feel like my heart can’t break any more, but it’s in the deepest places of grief, approaching the time of year when Toby was born and spent 12 incredible weeks with us, that I find that my heart, can and does continue to break. I was upstairs tonight helping Luke get ready for bed and...

Looking Back While Stepping Forward

Looking Back While Stepping Forward

Thank you to everyone who supported us, shared Toby’s story, donated to support a family, referred families (near and far) needing a monitor, encouraged us, and continue to believe in our mission to grow in 2020. 2019 was pretty amazing and we were continually reminded of Toby’s work from Heaven and presence in our lives daily. Although the heartache from his absence and the constant surge of grief is a piece of our lives that will never subside. No matter...

Finley the Fox – A Holiday Gift for Children

Finley the Fox – A Holiday Gift for Children

We are partnering with AVON to donate their 2019 Holiday Stuffed Animal to children in the hospital during this holiday season! Meet Finley the Fox! You can purchase Finley for $30. On average, Children's Hospital of Pittsburgh has 350 beds, a day, full. Our goal is to have 500 foxes purchased by the beginning of December so that we can deliver these gifts to those children. Your $30 purchase places Finley into one child's hand and a portion of the...

The Photo Shared ‘Round Steeler Nation

The Photo Shared ‘Round Steeler Nation

The last six hours have been nothing short of amazing. Dan and Luke went to Latrobe today to watch Steelers Training Camp, as they’ve done the past few years. Luke handed out Terrible Towels to Steelers fans as they arrived with Toby’s Random Acts of Kindness cards, in memory of his brother. Dan sent me some photos and I decided “on a whim” to tweet the photo and tag the Steelers and a few players, telling what this amazing 4...

Happy 3rd Birthday, Toby

Happy 3rd Birthday, Toby

Happy 3rd Birthday, Toby! We love & miss you so very much. We hope you were able to see and hear all the birthday wishes sent to Heaven for you today. View Toby's birthday video via YouTube: https://youtu.be/nNRbd48tKFM This video was complied by Dan, Toby's dad, for his special day. ♥️ **We do not own the rights to this U2 song. This was purchased thru iTunes for use in this video. In memory of Tobias Graham Stern.**