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Category: grief

This Season of Grief

Posted on by 4Cadmin

This Season of Grief

I’ve had to pray a lot more (than usual) this past month. I know I’ve talked before, but this is my season of grief. These are the days when the pain hits hard. Like take me to my knees, not able to catch my breath, pain. I spent two weeks writing the names of over 100 babies for us to honor during Wave of Light vigil and I found myself wondering about all of them. Did they know Toby? What...

What’s Heaven Like?

Posted on by 4Cadmin

What’s Heaven Like?

I wonder if it’s always sunny in Heaven? Does it get cold? Do you help the Angels make snowflakes before they fall to earth? Does Heaven have a Spring season? Or do the flowers always bloom anew? Do you have a bedtime? What size shoe do you wear? How fast can you run? And do you like to jump in puddles? I always thought you’d be a baseball player. That you’d be our boy who was the all-star pitcher. I...

Today Is The Trigger

Posted on by The Little Fox Foundation

Today Is The Trigger

Most people would look at this picture and laugh. The lady at the grocery store probably looked at me, saw parents with two small boys and a grocery cart full of food and just chalked it up to motherhood. It’s not that. I woke every hour last night and kept checking the clock. Luke came into the bedroom this morning and said “when are you getting up? It’s afternoon already!” I shot up in bed, petrified that it actually was....

Our Final Days – Four Years Later

Posted on by The Little Fox Foundation

Our Final Days – Four Years Later

This is the last picture we have as a family of four. I was forcefully reminded as I started my morning commute today that this is the week I hate. The recurring flashbacks of those final days for our family, of what we thought was a normal week. Crazy mornings trying to get Toby fed, Luke dressed, ready and out the door for work and school. Schedules coordinated for pick-up and drop off of two boys. School buses making each...

Fourth Annual Random Acts of Kindness Campaign

Posted on by The Little Fox Foundation

Fourth Annual Random Acts of Kindness Campaign

Our Fourth Annual Random Acts of Kindness Campaign kicks off on Saturday, August 1 and we would love your help to Pay it Forward the entire month of August! We are focusing our efforts on doing random acts of kindness around the Pittsburgh region, where our family lives, works, and plays, as well as some virtual Random Acts of Kindness (RAOK). You can download the RAOK Cards below. These are double-sided, business card size, leave-behinds that you can use when...

Keep Me In The Moment

Posted on by The Little Fox Foundation

Keep Me In The Moment

I am having a hard week. Each morning. Waking up. Getting ready for the day. It is my season of grief, which is heaviest because these are the days, when Toby was here with us, four years ago. [caption id="attachment_2398" align="aligncenter" width="768"] Toby & Mommy - August 2016[/caption] I continue to think about what it would be like to have him here, with all of us. Three little sets of feet running around. A need for three swimsuits, instead of...

Looking for the Light

Posted on by The Little Fox Foundation

Looking for the Light

I’ve looked at this picture 100xs since Wednesday morning. I was up early and crying before I even lifted my head off my pillow. I miss Toby. I want to hold my son. I want to say “You’re four!” And see him smile or laugh at me. I want to hear him laugh. I want to hug him and not let go. May 27, 2016 Wednesday I sat on the couch and waited for the sun. I thought it would...

May 2, 2020

Posted on by The Little Fox Foundation

May 2, 2020

There are days in our lives that we dream about. Birthday’s Graduation’s Wedding’s Anniversary’s The birth of a child Memorial services Family Gatherings We all have them and prepare for them in our own way. Today was one of those days for us. I have struggled with emotions all week. Today has been special for 14 months. A day when our amazing family and friends come together to help us celebrate Toby. We had people coming in from across the...

Sunsets & Signs From You

Posted on by The Little Fox Foundation

Sunsets & Signs From You

We have seen some incredible sunsets over the last few weeks. Quarantine has my heart, among other things, missing Toby so incredibly deeply. I always feel like my heart can’t break any more, but it’s in the deepest places of grief, approaching the time of year when Toby was born and spent 12 incredible weeks with us, that I find that my heart, can and does continue to break. I was upstairs tonight helping Luke get ready for bed and...

Inaugural Gala – Rescheduled

Posted on by The Little Fox Foundation

Inaugural Gala – Rescheduled

It is with a heavy heart that we announce the rescheduling of Toby’s Foundation Inaugural Gala to Saturday, May 1, 2021. This decision did not come easily, without much discussion amongst our Board of Directors over the last two weeks, and through a lot of prayers. The mission of Toby’s Foundation is about supporting the health and well-being of infants and families. With COVID-19 spreading throughout the United States, we are choosing to follow the guidance from the CDC and...