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Toby's Fourth Birthday Celebration

A Reason For The Season

A Reason For The Season

Today we pulled out all our Christmas decorations. Luke went with me and we picked out a new tree. Yes, we are decorating our home for the holiday season. To some it may seem to early. To others they may say "You're crazy" or "You're missing Thanksgiving." Actually, no, we're not. We will celebrate Thanksgiving next week. God willing our delivery goes well on Monday, we should be home Wednesday and we, as a family of five, will gather around...

Finding Our Footing in 2018

Finding Our Footing in 2018

As I sit in our home on the last day of 2017, my heart is fragile. This holiday season has been hard. The reality of Toby being gone, forever, was ever present over the past few weeks. Where many experienced cheer and love, we felt abandonment and sadness. It is hard to believe 2017 is nearly over. A full year without our son. No hugs or kisses. No first steps. No presents for Toby under the tree. As we stood...

My Faith in God

My Faith in God

This has been a difficult week for our family. Grief is hard. It's exhausting. It comes from nowhere. No warning. And it stays, for as long as it likes. You can have a good moment and the next you are crying. That happens with me a lot. Your body can ache from the physical pain of grief, not just pain from your heart. We pray for strength. We pray for understanding. We pray that Toby sees every tear that we...

2017 Innovative Educator Award

2017 Innovative Educator Award

With Father’s Day this past weekend I was thinking about what I wanted to write about my amazing husband and even more amazing father to our boys. Last Tuesday, Dan received the Michel J. Farrell Chair in Honor of Thomas N. Southard's Innovative Educator Award by Shady Side Academy and my excitement and pride for him were the exact words I was looking for to describe the incredible man he is. For those that have the privilege of knowing Dan, or...

Easter Morning in Heaven 

Easter Morning in Heaven 

Last Sunday as we sat in church for Palm Sunday mass, I was overcome with emotion thinking of what Heaven would be like for Easter and what beautiful sites Toby would see this week.  Can you imagine, seeing Jesus' face on Easter morning? I cannot, but the thought of my beautiful son having the honor to be in His presence this morning, it takes my breath away.  We were gifted a tree in rememberence of Toby in the fall and...

A New Endeavor

A New Endeavor

I have spend the last few weeks very focused in prayer. That was one of my small goals for the year. It has been normal in these times to also talk to Toby. Tell him what is on my heart and ask for guidance or some sort of sign as to whether or not I should even be carrying whatever it is that is heavy on my heart and mind. An opportunity presented itself at the beginning of January as...