I have watched this video multiple times this week, each time my mind thinking – This is us. This is me. Is this me? Why is this us? Why is this anyone? I know this is us because as I watch it I cry and cry because what I hear is what I am feeling. Some of her statements I can’t understand or haven’t come to grips with, maybe because my heart just doesn’t want to.
I see Toby in each of these children. His smile. His piercing blue eyes. I see him intently watching Luke playing. His laugh. Toby’s attentive eyes when he looked into ours. His peaceful expression when we was sleeping in my arms. I see Toby and my heart breaks a million times over.