I wonder if it’s always sunny in Heaven? Does it get cold? Do you help the Angels make snowflakes before they fall to earth? Does Heaven have a Spring season? Or do the flowers always bloom anew? Do you have a bedtime? What size shoe do you wear? How fast can you run? And do …
This little guy is 12 weeks old today. While this should be a celebrated milestone, my heart is heavy, my nerves are frazzled and on edge, and the anxiety running through me is intense. This was the last week we had Toby with us in our arms. Just a normal week, in our minds. Not …
August holds my fear. It holds my happiness and feeling of wholeness. August is where ‘who I was’ lives and ‘who I became’ appeared. August holds my sons last breath. It holds my whole heart. August holds captive my sons future and every motherly wish I could ever have for him. As I stand on …
Today marks another month without our son. It marks more milestones and brings with it more triggers – second spring break trip; first trip with the kids to DC; laughing with cousins and pictures where Toby’s always missing. Luke reminded us multiple times today that you are here with us and there have been little …
Life is hard. Grief is harder. It gets worse before it gets better. This makes everyday challenges & situations sharper and hard to not take directly to heart. I look around the world some days and then I look at Luke and think “Am I doing this right?” Honestly, some days I’m not sure. My …
For my latest article for Still Standing Magazine, I wrote about one of the unexpected grief triggers that has continually paralyzed me throughout these first 12 months of grief. You can read the article here: An Unexpected Trigger
Grief has a mind of its own. It has a way of rearing its head at a time that catches you with your guard down. It leaves you alone with your thoughts and deeply sad. Grief over these last four weeks has been quite harsh. Moments which have remained frozen or numb in my mind …
I can feel the memories coming before they are even in my mind. My heart hurts. My throat gets tight. My eyes begin to well. I know it’s going to hurt like hell, but I embrace it, because it’s embracing you. It’s an embrace that I don’t want to let go of. With each month …
www.farleykluger.com Over the last 10 months I have come across other grieving parent’s stories, whether at in-person meetings, from acquaintances that know someone who has lost a child, and through online forums and blogs supporting the bereaved community. There have been parents who’ve had to return to work three days after their child has died …
The Farley-Kluger Initiative – Parental Bereavement Leave Read More »
My Sweet Toby, We miss you so very much. I have spent this past week fighting the flashes of time. Fighting the pain that each memory brings. I have tried to prepare myself for this very week. But, as with the last nine months, there is no way to shield my heart from the pain …
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